Quibbons Quill

Hey, i've been reading the other critiques and they have good point's, you do need more tags and more description so you can keep the mystery without the reader just ...

Ok, i'm not going to do a line by line, because i cannot. I have neither the skill nor knowledge especially with a piece with such strange sentence structure. Firstly ...

Firstly, if Velton is a warewolf then take that first paragraph out, put it into the story in a different way, what she did on a cancelled period or something, ...

ok, so the story line, well to be honest there hasn't been much of a story line that i can criticize, i don't mean that in a bad way, the ...

Just a quick one, firstly i didn't know that the character was a girl until i read your quote at the end, maybe that was me not concentrating enough but ...

Sorry it toke so long for me to review i havn't been on YWS for ages. I only just got your PM. In general i would say that you need ...

thanks the fighting part was added in later and that is probably why it falls behind the other parts. I'm really keen on this story, next part up soon

Chapter One-To Make Time One Must First Kill It Robert was getting impatient, he took a last gulp of tea, which was now stone cold and looked around once more ...

I liked this, it reminded me of 80's fantasy but better and with more realistic dialogue. The mentioned rigging of the election at the end was a good ending and ...

I thought that the story was a bit cliched' as you mentioned and i didn't think that the writing was inventive enough to make up for that fact. Some bits ...

Thanks a lot for your reviews. They have really helped and i have made some of the changes suggested. The next part of the story should be up soon after ...

I like the piece, it has an individual tone. Their is of cause no story or plot in the traditional way. When i read it though it seemed more like ...

This is a review for all three parts of the story. I won't do any of the spelling ect as i didn't notice any and wouldn't have anyway because i'm ...

The writing was very good in parts and never bad. However as soon as i started reading, i wondered how long i would be able to read it for. It ...

I liked the way it was written, however at first i thought it was rather light hearted and original. That continued until the Uncle invited them to stay at the ...